Trusting your instincts

 I shouldn’t have done it. I. Should. Not. Have. Done. It. 

I bought a scale. In a previous blog, I directly said that I have an unhealthy relationship with scales and it eventually leads to discouragement.  Everyone kept asking how much weight I have lost... and I just became curious. Well, first, I sent it to the wrong address because Amazon switches my default to the place I used to live which happens to start with the same number to my current sweet ass apartment… and I keep forgetting to remove it. Should have been a sign, the universe saying “no you don’t need this”. Well I went to pick it up, unpacked it, right? And it was acting funny. Should have left it at that. Nope, switched out the batteries. I started to Envision a larger and larger amount of weight I could have lost considering the clear differences you can already see. So I step on and BAM! Immediate disappointment. Don’t get me wrong, 15 pounds in 5 weeks is pretty good but, I don’t know… I thought it would be more. I checked my weight 8 more times within a 15 hour period and now, much like Harry Potter and a certain potions book, the scale has been hidden from me upon my request. Since weighing myself, I kept catching glimpses of myself in mirrors, or windows, or anything reflective and I no longer saw my progress. I saw fat. I saw HUGE. 

Now that I haven’t weighed myself in over 24 hours I am feeling a little better. 

So this was a major reminder to trust yourself and know your limits. Don’t want to drink? Don’t. Camera shy? Alright! Someone giving you the creeps? Fuck politeness. Kids aren’t for you? There are already plenty people on this planet so you do you.

You know what is best for you in the end. My generation is great because we have seen what happens when you follow social norms because it’s what is expected… and we are forging our own paths. Find what makes you feel strong, empowered and motivated. Cling to it, and set fire to the rest. Metaphorically. 


Love

Sam


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